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Get Your Book Done … Now!
Published on Saturday, December 26, 2009 by Essays I don't believe in writer’s block. (I can hear the gasps of disbelief already.) Listen: If you hire a plumber to come to your house and fix a problem, do you expect him to say, "Sorry, I can't figure out what your problem is. I think I have plumber’s block"? Probably not, and if he did, you'd toss him out and call another guy faster than you can say Drano.... Read More »
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The Business of Publishing
Published on Thursday, October 22, 2009 by Essays Congratulations, you're published! But what exactly does it mean to be "published"? Besides the fact that your work is finally in print and your college alumni has asked to interview you for their newsletter it also means fame and fortune, right? Well, ok, maybe not on the level of J. K. Rowling, but at the very least you can expect a call from Oprah, right? I hate to... Read More »
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A Secret To Getting Published
Published on Saturday, October 17, 2009 by Essays When Warner Books, one of the world's largest publishing companies, published my first book, The Angry Clam, back in 1998, the most common question I was asked was, "What were you smoking when you wrote this book?" This was quickly followed by the second most common question, "How in the world did a 40-page, hand-written book with bad drawings of a clam get published?... Read More »
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I Quit And Other Sensible Ideas – Or, F...
Published on Tuesday, October 13, 2009 by Essays It comes along more frequently than not: The thought that you’re insane and should pursue a career that doesn’t stomp on your pride or demolish your ego. You have the hopes of fame and fortune to comfort you at times, but not often enough to keep doubt from gnawing at your mind. Discouragement is a constant companion. You face rejections. You spend time, ... Read More »
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Surviving The Day Job: Six Easy Lessons
Published on Sunday, July 26, 2009 by Essays Before I became a full-time writer, I had a job counting envelopes. Not colored envelopes or large manila envelopes, mind you, but white #10 envelopes. I had to count them in series of a hundred. Even now I can see them flashing in my eyes as I flipped through them, blinding myself as though I were looking out at a blanket of snow polished by the sun with dilated pupi... Read More »
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Getting Syndicated
Published on Wednesday, July 15, 2009 by Essays Over the years I’ve spoken to a number of authors who say they aspire to write a syndicated column. Getting syndicated is a great idea, albeit a challenging one. If you’ve thought of this no doubt most (if not all) of your competition has too. But don’t let this discourage you; while syndication may take a while, it’s still worth pursuing. The... Read More »
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Publicity From Thirty Thousand Feet
Published on Friday, July 10, 2009 by Essays We all know that marketing a book is a process. But sometimes the process takes longer than we’d anticipated. That’s why it’s nice every now and again to hop aboard the publicity jet and get a look-see at what you’ve been doing from the thirty-thousand foot level. Why? Well, first off this birds-eye view will reveal to you areas you might be ov... Read More »
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Seven Secrets of Writing a Book That Sells
Published on Thursday, June 25, 2009 by Essays It's one thing to write a book, it's an entirely different thing to write one that's a saleable, viable, marketable product. Ensuring the success of a book is something even the biggest publishers have never been able to guarantee. Mitigating circumstances, flash trends, and world events will all affect buyer preferences. That said, there are still ways to leverage th... Read More »
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Querying: One Author
Published on Thursday, March 26, 2009 by Essays When I was functioning as that lowest of all life forms, the unpublished author, I benefited from established novelists willing to share their experiences. This article is intended to give something back, especially since my experience had some unexpected turns. I quickly learned to prefer sending queries by snail mail. Yes, it is slower, expensive, and more work, b... Read More »
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On The Planet Corporate: Survival Through Fic...
Published on Friday, January 23, 2009 by Essays I found myself sitting in the HR department of one of the most famous companies in America. My ice queen soon to be boss wanted me and I knew it. After all, I had graduated from a pseudo impressive university and I looked really good in my Ann Klein suit. Problem was, I'd never worked a day in Corporate America and I had just turned fifty. Hard to teach an old dog new... Read More »

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